Time Fading Away

*This is something I wrote based on a word prompt on Inspiration Monday over at the Be Kind Rewrite blog. *

English: Fading light at Glanvilles Wootton A ...

English: Fading light at Glanvilles Wootton A watery gateway on the footpath from Harbins farm to Pulham catches the last of the evening light coming through the trees. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Bodies age, weaken, and are degraded by multiple diseases. Merely part of the natural life process, everyone says. This is where we are and why he sleeps so much more. This is why life is so still and there is so much loneliness. There is no return to the past and no future, only the present.  The present brings no gifts, only further decline and fading.

Death feels ominously near, but may not come for years and this unmoving world will continue to seem endless. Wishing not to hasten death, but wishing for more certainty or just the ability to understand.  Wishing people did not persist in asking the simple question, “Are you okay?”. It’s not such a simple question. It feels as if they want a false answer, one I am not able to give. The truth, “No, I’m not okay.” I want to ask, “How could I be?”. It’s often easier for a lie to slip past my lips and say, “I’m fine”.

Sadness from not knowing seeps in and takes over. Tears constantly feel near flowing, but never come. Things needing done are in abundant supply and calling out. Yet I sit here and think, but not really truly think. Present, but not really. Attempting to turn to endless distractions in an effort for a less painful facade. Daylight is fading, seems the morning was not long ago.

The time thief has crept in and stolen the day. This one as the one before. This has gone on for far too long. I must awaken, before my life winds down. I must remember how to live life before the time thief vanishes away with my days. There exists so many uncertainties in life, but some things are certain, the number of our days is not known and we must live life before it fades away.